Do you have a house or a home?
It’s an old question. You’ve heard it before, probably in some feel-good TV commercial or on an uber-dramatized home remodel show!! “A house is four walls…A home is what you make it.”
A home, we say, is made of memories…of people…of joy.
But let me challenge that: if a home is defined by people and memories, then why do so many family-filled homes still feel…off? Why do some rooms leave you agitated, overstimulated, or avoidant altogether? And why do even the most thoughtfully designed homes still sometimes fall flat?
The truth is that most people CAN’T define what “home” really is to them. We first think of what we do at home, or the people we’re with, but never the emotion that makes us feel at home in the first place.
And, without putting that feeling into words, we don’t know how to create a home after all.
How We Feel About “Home”
About a month ago, I put up a little poll to friends, clients, and industry peers. Just one question:
What does “home” mean to you?
I provided four options. Here are the results from everyone’s votes:
- Where loved ones best interact – 0%
- Where you’re your best self – 11%
- Where you recharge and rest – 22%
- Where you’re most at ease – 67%
The clear winner? Where you’re most at ease. NOT where memories are made with loved ones. Wow! Home isn’t where we entertain, either! Or where we connect. Or even where we feel we’re “at our best.” Those things can also happen in establishments like restaurants or hotels or gyms, or in others’ homes, or in vacation rentals, etc.
“Home” is about a physical, emotional, and sensory feeling of EASE that finally lets you exhale.
Comfort…and I mean true, indulgent, restorative comfort…has become the ultimate luxury. It’s the new status symbol!! And if that’s what we crave, then now is time to design for it.
Let me show you how!!
A Bedroom That Gives You Permission to Completely Let Go
Your bedroom should be the most calming space in your home. Not only soft, but soothing. Not only stylish, but supportive.
I wrote in GREAT detail about this a few weeks ago, if you want a deeper look…
Here’s what to design for:
- Natural light filtering (not flooding) with layered window treatments
- Colors rooted in personal emotional response, not trends or even color psychology
- Mattress and bedding selections based on sleep science as well as feel
- Hidden or sound-absorbing features to mute outside noises
- A lighting plan that mimics circadian rhythm: low, warm light in the evenings; soft, energizing in the mornings…
A Bathroom Designed for a Daily Retreat
Repeat after me: your bathroom should feel like an intimate space for your daily retreat, not just your “routine.”
And if your bathroom design doesn’t even support your ROUTINE…oh man…then you’re suffering needlessly!!
Here’s what to design for:
- Heated floors and towel warmers for sensory indulgence
- Non-glare lighting layered with backlit mirrors or sconces
- Shower experiences with steam, aromatherapy, or customizable pressure
- Spa-inspired storage that puts everything just where you want it
- Finishes that feel as good as they look (brushed textures, organic stone, etc.)
The Kitchen: Nourishment Only, No Stress Allowed!
Your kitchen makes the routines you want to keep easier, not just the routines you have now. It sparks all the right kinds of creativity.
Even if you don’t cook in the most elaborate sense of the word, your kitchen needs to nourish you visually and socially (because you KNOW people will perpetually gather there).
Here’s what to design for:
- Workflow layouts that reflect your habits, not generic “work triangles”
- Concealed appliances and clutter control for visual calm
- Adjustable lighting zones for prep, cooking, and entertaining
- Seating that encourages comfortable lingering where no one’s in anyone else’s way
- Finishes that are luxurious but also low-maintenance
Your Emotional “Reset” in the Living Room
In the living room or lounge or family room, wherever you flop down at the end of the day, the whole environment should feel like a hug! This is where your day softens…not just where you hang nice décor and show off your taste in art!!
Here’s what to design for:
- Seating depth personalized to your likes and needs, and angles that invite relaxation
- Acoustic layering using rugs, textiles, or curtains to soften sound
- Thoughtful tech integration that doesn’t dominate the space
- Lighting that shifts from ambient to task to mood with ease
- A mix of materials that feel tactile and timeless
Indoor-Outdoor Spaces
Spending a little time in nature is the fastest route to feeling at ease. Why do you think indoor-outdoor renovations are the most popular now?! Creative spaces are joining kitchens to patios, or pools to family rooms. And why not? Outdoor spaces expand your sense of home into an environment that has a profound impact on your sense of well-being.
Here’s what to design for:
- Seamless indoor-outdoor flow with consistent flooring or lines
- Shaded retreats that feel private and protected
- Water or fire features for sensory grounding
- Comfortable seating built for long evenings, not quick cocktails
- Lighting that extends your use of the space without harsh glare
This list of outdoor design ideas will make your jaw drop!! Can you imagine enjoying one of these spaces?!
Investments for Your Return On EnjoymentTM
Designing a home means creating the spaces where you feel completely at ease. That’s your emotional investment that pays dividends daily.
That, by the way, is EXACTLY what I mean when I talk about Return On EnjoymentTM. It’s the guiding principle behind every project we touch. Because…when a space brings you ease, you love it more…and you live in it better…and you carry that joy with you everywhere you go.
So, do YOU have a house? Or do you have a home?!
About the author:
Robin Burrill, RID, NCIDQ, ASID, IDS, CAPS, is an award-winning professional kitchen, bath, and interior designer. Robin and her husband, Robert Mathews, have owned Signature Home Services, Inc. for over three decades, establishing a superior in-house team with a widespread reputation for delivering meticulous design to their many repeat clients.
In 2022, the national publication, Kitchen and Bath Design News magazine, named Robin to their Top Innovator list in recognition of her achievements in the field of kitchen and bath design. In 2024, she was named one of the Fall 2024 Market Pros and “tastemakers” by ANDMORE at High Point Market. Also in 2024, Fixr identified her as one of the Top Professional Interior Designers for their nationwide audience. At the start of 2025, she then acted as one of Dallas Market’s “Style Eyes” at Lightovation and Total Home & Gift Market.
Over her extensive career, Robin has been quoted in Architectural Digest and Forbes multiple times; her design work has been featured in top national trade publications; and she has been interviewed for Designers Today magazine’s “Profiles in Design” video series, among others. Widely respected for the depth of her knowledge, Robin is a sought after speaker and judge for many design industry events.
In 2023, Robin designed a bench for Charleston Forge, making her foray into product design. Robin currently serves as a volunteer on the board of the Dallas/Ft. Worth chapter of the Interior Design Society.
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